Sunday, December 11, 2011

Ain't I a woman?

Dear Guy "Friends,"

Yes, I know in your eyes I'm not a woman. I am someone you don't ever think about fucking. As I am not a woman to you, you feel perfectly comfortable making lewd comments about other women in front of me, blatantly staring at other women in front of me, and constantly reminding me that I am as anatomically equipped as a Cabbage Patch Kid in your mind.

You dismiss any possible idea of me as a sexual being. To complement this, if I show any sign of offense at your behavior, you blame me. You tell me it's my fault I'm made uncomfortable by the two-fold insult of your acting piggish toward other women and also managing to insult me to my face. After all, I should know I'm an ugly woman that is no one's object of sexual desire. I should also know what kind of woman is everyone's object of desire. Due to these truths, I should accept my role, sit back, and shut up about how hurtful you are being to me. I knew from the get go that I was not a sexual being to you, but I spent time with you anyway. I should be used to the kinds of things you say by now and they should no longer be hurtful. Mea culpa.

I should not be offended that you spend time with me only long enough to fill the void until something more interesting comes along. If I see an attractive woman, I should know you want me to leave and should do so quietly and willingly, without argument or resentment. While you don't acknowledge that I have a vagina, you do acknowledge that I don't have a penis, so when your bro-friends come along, I should know to take similar action.

I should also learn that it is my fault that you make me feel like shit. I'm not "confident" enough not to be bothered by both your obvious disdain for my appearance and your commentary of any other woman's appearance but mine, so until despite being constantly insulted, I become confident, I deserve to be treated poorly. Once again, by now I should have realized my role and should no longer complain about it if I want to spend any time around you.

I also realize, I best not dare to give my commentary about any man other than you and if it's about you, it best be a glowing review. I better not watch another man walk by. I better not even mention another man's name in a positive way in your presence. I better not even acknowledge that there are any men in the room, or in the universe, except for you. That would just be rude of me. I know it makes you feel insecure and uncomfortable and it's polite to abstain from activities that inspire such emotions.

When I occasionally slip and make a comment about another man or you see my eyes wandering in his direction, please stop me and remind me of how rude I am being. You deserve more respect than that. You deserve to know that, although you see nothing sexually positive about me and have no problem constantly reminding me of it, I still see everything sexually positive about you, even though you have no desire to act on that.

Thank you so much for keeping me in line.

KT Pin It

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